Insight · Just Thoughts #62
Intimacy of Violence
Some stories don't begin with answers, but with the courage to finally speak.
A conversation with M. L. Habacuque (Miranda)
Too long; did read
- 1Some stories don't fit frameworks — listening to them is the most uncomfortable form of thinking.
- 2The oppressor is not always outside the community; internal violence cuts deepest.
- 3Privilege is invisible until you sit across from someone who has never had it.
- 4Courage to speak and courage to truly listen are two sides of the same leadership skill.
- 5Difficult conversations don't begin with answers — they begin with the willingness to be changed by what you hear.
Difficult conversations & bias
Six Bias Realisations
Each realisation surfaces a bias that is invisible until named — and offers a leadership reflection for your own context.
What Miranda showed us
The oppressor is not always outside the community. Competition, beauty standards, passing, skin color — small things cut the deepest. A community is never one thing.
Leadership reflection
Leaders who assume marginalized groups are monolithic miss the fractures within. Real inclusion requires understanding intra-community dynamics, not just inter-group ones.
Context
How This Conversation Happened
Nicolas sat down with Miranda to look at her writing — Notion pages filled with content, a notepad with drawings, and a lot of thoughts. One title page stood out: "Intimacy of Violence." She told him this story was one she hadn't written yet. He said, "Let me help, let's talk through it."
Mics on, recording on. She spoke; he reflected. After an hour of discussion, the recording was processed into a spoken-word podcast — Miranda's story of the intimacy of violence, transcribed.
It puts other discussions in perspective. When have you truly listened — not on TV, but in conversation? When have you appreciated the privileges you hold, or even identified what they are?
Related reading
Just Thoughts #20 — Art Exhibitions & Normalising Being "Different"
On trans history, allyship, and the difference between AI-generated art and human art.
Operation Tarantula — Historical Context
The 1987 São Paulo police campaign that targeted travestis and trans women under the pretext of public health.
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